The writer/director Richard Linklater has developed a reputation over his career for creating films that are as unique as they are poignant. 1993's "Dazed and Confused" perfectly captured the struggles of Gen-X teenagers coming of age in the mid 70s with an appropriate dichotomy of humor and darkness. 2001's "Waking Life" offers a fascinating (if somewhat contrived) look at the idea of lucid dreaming and a meticulous examination of previously-taboo philosophical issues. Even 2003's "The School of Rock" managed to avoid the stereotype usually associated with Jack Black films - the viewer’s eventual self-immolation.

There is an issue with Linklater's latest, however, entitled "Me and Orson Welles" - and it's much larger than the promotion of poor grammar.

You see, "Me and Orson Welles" casts manikin-faced Zac Efron in the lead, most known by film fans for his bewildering ability to coerce his high school basketball team into practicing for their next foe by singing and synchronized-dancing on the Disney Channel. They may lose by sixty points, but by God, they'll put the halftime show to shame.

Now, obviously the apocalypse that is the "High School Musical" film series isn't necessarily intended for my demographic, and I understand that. I wouldn't so much have an issue with Mr. Efron (and his partnership with Linklater) if he didn't pose for every red carpet photo like somebody just asked him the distance in centimeters between Neptune and Venus. No smiles, just brooding. I'm not happy to be here, YOU'RE happy to witness this face.

So you'll excuse my skepticism when I question whether he'll be able to adequately portray a typical teenager in 1937.

Wait, wait, hold on. What do you mean there was no mascara in the 1930s? That does it. I'll be in my trailer singing about the other team's point guard.